Sunday, November 8, 2009

Dressage Queen?

Words are funny. Labels are misleading. Being an English teacher, I value words and proper usage. ;)

Having recently been "accused" of being a dressage queen (DQ), I have thought about this term lately. Obviously it is a derogatory term used to describe someone who partakes in the sport of dressage. I personally think there are many people who qualify to be called such a name, myself NOT being one of them. Interestingly enough, many of these folks who are so deserving do not even ride dressage........hmmmmmmmm. Interesting, you say?

So I have my own ideas about what a dressage queen is. I used the almighty web to help me create a the following list.

1) A dressage queen has more bling on her tack than is necessary.
Nope, not me! Yes, I do own four tastefully beaded browbands. But that is the KEY WORD: tasteful. I am not the type of person who thinks hot pink and Swarovski crystals are a good thing. GAG.

2)When you show up to a barn and there is a loud voice, this is your first clue that you might be approaching a dressage queen.
Again, not me! I am not the type of person who is loud and overbearing. Yes, you might hear me laughing loudly because I like to have fun, but I am not a blah-blah-blah let-me-tell-you-all-about-my-horse and how she is the top performance horse in the country kind of person. YIKES!

3) Once you get closer to that loud voice, look for manicured nails, the second sign of a dressage queen.
OMG, definitely NOT ME! :) I cannot think of anything more putrid than designer nails. GAG again.

4) Don’t listen to what the voice is saying, you might get sucked into an hour long conversation you never intended on being a part of, which is the third sign of a dressage queen.
OMG, I like to talk. But I have a very good sense of the fact that I am not the most important person in the world. I do not need to go on and on and get attention. Nope, just not me.

5) Look for the tack trunk the loud voice is going to, if it is filled with every color pad, matching polo wraps, at least 10 different brow bands, or basically a well stocked tack shop, that is your fourth sign of a dressage queen.
Yes, I admit, I like tack. But I do NOT have 18 bridles, breastplates, saddle pads, etc. etc. that I have to cart around everywhere and show off. :) I do not have a traveling tack shop when I show. I might have three different disciplines of tack, but I am not overboard.

6) Excuses and drama are a final guaranteed sign of a dressage queen. She has every excuse, besides her inability to ride, for why her horse is not going well, including that the judge is just TERRIBLE!
Again, just not me. I do not make excuses for my horse. Yes, I might admit that it is my fault that she is not going well, or that she had a vaccine right before the show (see post about UNH show.....sigh), or that the footing is bad. There are definitely reasons behind why my horse does not perform the best she can. But usually it is my fault. And I DO NOT EVER act like a sore loser when the judge does not pin me in an open show when I think my horse should have placed. I may compete wholeheartedly, but I win graciously and lose GRACEFULLY. Always. You will never hear me wailing and screaming across the showgrounds about how the judge was bad or did not look at my horse. Showing is subjective and I accept that.

There is a great little "tip of the month" in this November's issue of the Horse's Maine. I love what it says about not spouting off. I have witnessed this and it is SO unattractive and DRESSAGE QUEEN LIKE! LOL! Ugly, just ugly. To be such a sore loser is just ridiculous.

And of course drama. You are most certainly a dressage queen if you thrive on drama. I know people like this and I have systematically cut them out of my life. There is no reason for negativity, jumping to conclusions, hearing/reading only what you want to hear, being unable to work with others, acting vicious and rude, etc etc.

So I think I have effectively cleared up the fact that while I can act spoiled and snobby at times, I am certainly NOT a dressage queen. But I do know plenty of people who do not even RIDE dressage who fit each and every one of these criteria. :D


Check out: http://www.citizenhorse.com/2008/04/16/dressage-queens/

ETA: I was kindly reminded today by a friend that DQ actually stands for DRAMA QUEEN! LOL! ;-) And that I should, of course, wear my "tiara" proudly. LOL!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D Inside joke, but funny nonetheless.

6 comments:

LiveToFly said...

"5) Look for the tack trunk...if it is filled with every color pad, matching polo wraps, at least 10 different brow bands, or basically a well stocked tack shop, that is your fourth sign of a dressage queen"

So...that might just describe my tack trunk...LOL. But since I'm not much of a dressage queen, what does that make me? Hahaha great little article tidbit!

OnTheBit said...

You forgot to add terror of jumping anything (even a ground pole is scary to some of these people) or fear of leaving the ring. Some of the woman at my trainers barn are too scared to even get on and walk mounted the quarter mile to the ring. They are scared their horses will spook so they hand walk only. And you might not be able to see me but trust in the fact that I am rolling my eyes right now.

Kate said...

I hate people who are loud around horses - they don't like it and neither do I. And manicured nails equals full service!

AareneX said...

I don't think I'm in danger of becoming a dressage queen any day soon, since I'm the first to acknowledge that my horse is a better dressage horse than I am a dressage rider...sigh...but we're both trying a lot, and that's where the fun is anyhow.

Oh, and pretty tack. I love pretty tack.

Lilleman said...

LMFAO..........!!!

STB Eventer said...

ha ha ha....I KNEW you would enjoy this Lilleman! :D